Scary Humor

Monday, June 20, 2011

Oh no! Another Writing Exercise

The first sentence was given. Write three minutes. What did you write? Share your results in the comments section. Or send it to me for posting later. My result…

Their father was one of the landed gentry in a land without gentry. Without fertile land for that matter. What need of land on a rock being mined for its nickel and small quantities of precious metals? Food you import from the bases on the south side of the moon. Landed gentry, hah. Most of them were women and they were company men, or women, as the case may be. Mine supervisors. But we called them landed gentry because they landed first. And they got to take off first at the end of the three-year shift, which now has a mere 13 months, 3 weeks and two days to go. Zelda Zilroy was of the landed gentry. She owned the land I mined with Zorkgrack, my botdrill. Of the two I preferred Zelda, but she was the bossier of the two. Zorkgrack was the better cook. But Zorkgrack in bed is just something I don’t want to think about, especially with Zelda leaning over my shoulder right now.

Wednesday, June 15, 2011

Road Ends

Who knows why the road ends here? And whatever happened to old Naperville? Folks in these parts know the answer but they'll never tell. Men in black suits come around and then folks go missing. But we're not afraid. This video tells all.

Tuesday, June 7, 2011

Rediscovering the Ring

The door popped open with a shove from Georgia. She pushed her nose through followed by her cheeks. The rest of her flew into the tiny home thanks to a giant shove from Donna. Donna, always the skinny, size four one, squished herself through the doorway and landed in the teeny hallway that led to a room beyond.

“I said it was a dollhouse.” Donna rubbed her nose.

“Too big. I’m thinking midgets.” Georgia managed to sit up without hitting the ceiling.

“Dwarfs?” Donna crawled into the room at the end of the hall which turned out to be a tiny living room.

“Height challenged.” Georgia plopped on the petite couch leaving no room for Donna to join her.

“Small size advantaged.” Donna sat on the floor and stretched her legs into the dinning room.

“Extinct whoever they were.” Georgia smiled at the row of tiny books on the shelf above Donna’s head.

Donna rubbed her fingers along the mantel. “It’s so eloquently carved.”

Georgia peeked over Donna’s shoulder. “What’s that funny looking ring? Is it gold?”

Donna picked it up and put it on her finger. Immediately she felt her mind blasted by an all pervading eyeball. "Looks harmless."

"Let me see." Georgia reached for the ring.

Donna slapped Georgia's hand away. "Isn't it precious? I think I'll keep it."

The End

Fulfillment is coming. Tell everyone!

Tuesday, May 31, 2011

I Have a Dream

Memorial Day is a time to remember the sacrifice of those who have made our freedom possible. They had dreams once, those young men and women who died fighting for us. As did those not so young military personnel who made the ultimate sacrifice on our behalf.

Revisit the Rev. Dr. Martin Luther King's "I Have a Dream" speech. Think about your own dreams. And then step back into an earlier time to visit the home front in 1967 during the Viet Nam era.

This is the beginning of the Fulfillment campaign. Watch this space for more Fulfillment and ...tell everyone.

Read a short story: Little Miss Forgotten available at Amazon for $0.99

About Little Miss Forgotten 
The time is summer 1967, and you’re soon to be drafted when you meet her. But what is she?

Little Miss Forgotten is a suspense thriller mixed with lively humor and teen angst. Add a twist of horror and mystery. Set in the midst of war and fear of war. Life on the home front during the Viet Nam era. Short Story. 3,000 words.

Story Preview
"Do you wanna dance?" Okay, it was the name of a top ten hit, and today's kids would sneer if they heard me, but in 1967 it worked.

She hesitated. She frowned. She stared for what seemed an eternity, (about three seconds). "Sure, why not?"

I don't remember the song. The band was on break, and the young kids who worked as house deejays were playing records. It was a fast one. You just didn't ask a girl to dance a slow one the first time. You had to dance a couple of fast ones first. At a nice suburban Catholic church hall like Holy Cross, a girl accepting a slow dance was giving you an invitation to climb all over her.

For your Kindle: Little Miss Forgotten available at Amazon for $0.99

Need another format? Send me a buck and I'll send you a PDF. Three bucks gets you the hard copy paper version. Email me to start the ball rolling.

 Fulfillment... Tell Everyone!

Tuesday, May 24, 2011

A Visit with Donna Fletcher Crow

Donna Fletcher Crow stopped by to chat about A Very Private Grave, her new novel in her series The Monastery Murders. And graciously answered a few questions.

1. Your novel, A Very Private Grave, has a modern heroine, but the plot requires she study the past to learn ancient truths. How challenging was it to delve into the past while staying true to the present? As a writer of historical novels, do you find it easier and more fun to play in the past or to write in the present?

You’re very right, Paul. This is a contemporary novel, but in order to solve the brutal murder of Felicity’s favorite monk and to prevent St. Cuthbert’s fabled treasure from falling into the wrong hands she and her church history lecturer must explore the events of centuries past.

Since most of my novels are set in Britain and I live 7000 miles away in Boise, Idaho, the research is always a challenge— whether historical or contemporary. I have to plan my stories very carefully and do all the research I can from home in order to make the absolute maximum use of my time on site.

Once I’m there, though, I don’t find much difference between researching the present or digging into the past. I go to all the places my characters will be going to and learn everything I can about it— past and present.

Since all of the Monastery Murders books are contemporaries with lots of digging around in the past I think I have the best of both worlds, as you say, “playing in the past and writing in the present.” I would hate to have to choose between them.

2. What prompted you to write this story?

I have wanted to tell Saint Cuthbert’s story since I first “met” him many years ago at Durham Cathedral. That a life of such simple, quiet holiness could have been so influential that it is still inspiring people more than 13 centuries after his death really intrigued me. I had convinced three previous editors to publish a similar story, but something else always got in the way of the writing. I think the time just wasn’t right. When our daughter went off to study in a monastery in Yorkshire and I got acquainted with the monks the background for The Monastery Murders began to take vibrant shape in my mind.

3. Are you writing a new novel at the moment? Can you tell us anything about it?

Oh, thank you for asking, Paul. Writers always want to talk about their current projects, don’t we? Book 2 in the series A Darkly Hidden Truth, which involves such disparate characters from the past as the enclosed mystic Julian of Norwich, Peter the Great and the Knights of Malta will be out this fall.

So I am hard at work on book 3 which I am calling An Unholy Communion as a working title. This is another story I’ve wanted to tell for many years: Wales from the very beginning with the birth of Saint David, Wales’ patron saint, in the sixth century, through the Roman occupation and on into the early 20th century with the Welsh Revival to today.

I have just returned from a research trip to all the scenes I will be developing, but I’ll have to say I didn’t stumble over a single dead body— some things are best left to fiction.

Click here to find her book on Amazon.


Wednesday, May 18, 2011

Astronauts

Astronauts risked their lives, living in a tin can in space.
Dozens of astronauts flew this way.
Can you name any? Name two.

No one will remember your success.
No one will remember your failure.

Trust your judgment and your instincts.
Move forward boldly in your calling.
Be yourself.
Enjoy.

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