Minimizing Was

I’m at the point in editing my new novel Faerie Tale where I’m searching for the word “was” with the idea of replacing it with an active verb. Here’s one example:

Original: The effect was to make him bend forward while running, pushing his butt up in the process so the second punch hit his right buttock instead of his back or kidney area.

Revision: He bent forward as he ran so the second punch hit his right buttock instead of his back or kidney area.

As a storyteller, I focus on the story itself while writing the first draft knowing I’ll catch the weak constructions during the editing process. Among other things, editing includes searching for weak words and replacing them with stronger writing. Sometimes this means a simple replacement such as replacing “walk” with “saunter.” Other times it involves a total revision of the sentence so the writing matches the power of the tale I’m telling. Editing – it’s not for the faint of heart, but it moves the serious writer farther along the path to excellence.