Fiction that explores the monsters and strangers among us.

Monday, March 28, 2011

Prom Pranks

My writer friend Krista Phillips once asked our now defunct online writer’s group for advice on prom pranks. She wrote, “I need an idea for a really good prank that a guy and his friends might try to pull to ruin a prom. I was thinking it could be something they would want to videotape for YouTube since teens are all in to that these days.”

My response
1. Stink bombs. Works every time. There's the cloud of dust, the hearty "Hi-yo-Silver and away" as the masked dude runs out of the place in time to avoid any stink on himself. That's how we know he did it of course. He's the one that doesn't smell. He's also the one with the video camera recording the mass exodus for presentation on YouTube.

2. Bug the ladies room with hidden cameras. Not a CBA solution, but it worked in "Revenge of the Nerds. "Ohmigod, a nerd saw me naked!" Of course, it works better if you bug a dorm or sorority. Still, you could catch all those cool conversations the guys would love to hear. "Tony doesn't know it yet, but this is his lucky night."

3. Give drugs to the band. Makes for great song lyrics until somebody tells the principal to listen to the words carefully. Could make for a great YouTube moment.

4. Start a rumor that the prom queen has been cheating on the captain of the football team with the captain of the basketball team while messing around with a nerd on the side. Stand back because the punches are going to fly. Another great YouTube moment.

5. Release a dozen mice while the band is playing that special slow song.

6. Do all of the above -- now you have a YouTube moment no one will ever forget.

7. Almost forgot -- See all those balloons hanging from the ceiling? Some wise guy filled them with paint and the paint is weighing down the balloons so they are about to start dropping from the ceiling any second and omygosh that one just splattered Emily Brickbrine's prom dress. Look out, here comes another one. Do you have your video camera running?

8. Okay, I'm getting warmed up now. Ever see the eighties movie "Sixteen Candles?" Here's the easy variation... a guy swipes a pair of his sister's panties and brings them to the prom. He waits until the evening is about half over (right before the paint balloons start to drop) and then tells all the guy's that the prom queen gave him her panties because she is so hot for all the guys. Then he shows the proof. The prom queen never knew she had so many guy friends and the prom king is about jealous and something interesting has to come out of this. And what with the rumor mill going full force from idea number 4 above... this can't end well.

9. Did you remember to spike the punch with grain alcohol or vodka?

10. Alice B. Toklas Brownies... Spike the desert with marijuana.

11. Or if you are just lazy and mean and don't plan to go to the prom anyway, call in a bomb scare.

12. Some of the guys could get together and hire prostitutes to be their prom dates and then turn 'em loose on the other guys. That has to tick off the girls big time. Stand back because the punches are going to fly and those girls hit hard.

13. When the band is about to go on break, one of the guys jumps up on stage, grabs a mic and announces that somebody important has just been assassinated (former Gov Blogoyovich?) so the rest of the prom is canceled so everyone can go home and watch the news.

14. While everyone is dancing to that special song, sneak around the tables and place a condom at every place setting. Not a biggie, but it is a great ice breaker.

I'm thinking you combine all of them. You'll have a scene out of "It's a Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad World." Your book will be NY Times #1. You'll make big bucks on the movie rights including a percentage of gross because you know Lindsey and Britney will play the prostitutes and you'll owe me big time.

Side note: Please keep Krista and her family in your prayers as they await word on a new heart for Krista’s baby daughter. See Krista's blog

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