The Final Meeting of the Moon Watcher's Club

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The Moon Watchers Club chased a herd of 12 does and one buck over in rural Kane County this past full moon cycle. Before they tired, Snorewort picked up the scent of a cow despite his fever. The pack soon settled for a cow asleep in the Brickslobber's north forty. Daisy had wandered out of the barn earlier that evening, according Sheriff Ivan Wilson quoted in the Daily Hopper.

Henry J. Snorewort collapsed after he severed the cow's jugular vein. Ira Brickslobber found him in the morning. Henry lay next to the bloody remains of the half-eaten cow. The autopsy later revealed he died of Covid 19. From that night's gathering, six members of the Moon Watcher's Club spread the Corona virus to three high schools where they infected fellow staff members. No students were affected due to remote learning. The club members each served as assistant principals. Three other Moon Watchers Club associates spread Covid to 150 co-workers at the factories or warehouses that employed them. Four Evangelical Christian werewolves spread the Corona virus to more than 500 worshipers due to these conservative churches' refusal to shut down or require masks and social distancing. For some reason God chose not to protect these congregants when the werewolf members attended.

Thanks to the werewolves, not only did a Kane County cow part ways with the earth, but also the Moon Watchers wreaked havoc upon their home county. DuPage County's death count set records that moon cycle for new cases of the pandemic disease. The death of the members of the Moon Watchers Club rid the DuPage County forest preserve district of one of its most vexing problems, the large amount of wolf poo left on the forest preserve trails during the full moon along with any number of partially-devoured carcasses of small animals and late evening joggers.

Mrs. Snorewort collected on her late husband's million-dollar life insurance. She quit her job at Walmart, sold her Naperville home (one of those big jobs) and moved to Florida where she died of Covid three weeks after her arrival. No one bothered to track the body count from her move either in Florida or at the many stops she made along the drive. Her two adult children plan to use the Florida home as a getaway for winter vacations. For some reason, the kids never caught Covid. Yet.

THE END

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