Scary Humor

Monday, March 11, 2019

Where There's Smoke

They chopped down the giant willow and hauled the logs to the site of the annual end of school year bonfire. It wasn’t until Casey and the rest of the phi beta alpha crew stacked the logs for the fire that Dean Altman noticed his favorite tree missing.

“I’ll expel the whole fraternity for this,” Dean Altman shouted. He obviously forgot that using foul language on campus was forbidden and punishable by dismissal unless the professor had tenure, which Dean Altman obviously did. Nor did Dean Altman seem to recall that finals were over, the grades were in and the sheepskins printed. Real sheepskins in those days, not the embossed paper ones they use today.

After the lads stacked the chairs, desks and other old furniture no longer needed by students, Nickie Tunnelston torched the stack. Her powder blue miniskirt began to smoke when she forgot to back away from the flames soon enough. The smoldering cloth didn't burn her in the end.

Danny McCallister did a yeoman's job of throwing her on the ground. He ripped off her skirt like he had experience with such matters. He patted her down and wrapped her with his blazer. He, of course, patted her legs high enough to make sure Nickie felt safe. She felt safe to him. And if Nickie's smile was any indication, she felt safe, too. Yes, Nickie's skirt set their romance ablaze which just goes to show where there's smoke, you can always go a little higher.

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