Scary Humor

Wednesday, January 18, 2017

Are You The Best Person to Write Your Book?

Blog Your Way to a Book Series #4

Before reading this blog, take advantage of my special offer of a free ebook in honor of St.Patrick's Day. Click the Special Offers button above for more information.

Of course you are! You’re the expert in your chosen topic – or you will be by the time you research your topic and place your unique spin on it. You need two things to qualify as a business book author. You can handle both of them or hire a pro for the job. But in the end, your blog post requires the involvement of your brain. Two things you need to qualify as the best person to write your book:
1. Writing Skills
2. Something to Say

Writing Skills
Well, duh. Remember in this series you don’t have to worry about writing your book yet. Instead, write a series of simple blog posts. Posts may run anywhere from about a hundred words to say 500 at the high end. Write your blog post until finished. If it seems long, chop it into two blog posts. Writing a blog post requires:
Knowledge and expertise: Write your message based on your expertise for the topic and theme you have already chosen (review the previous blog post on this topic if you haven’t taken this step yet.)
Critical thinking skills: When you write about a topic you have to analyze it and render judgments that will inform your readers and motivate them to act in new ways.
Wordsmithing: You should have at least a basic understanding of how to structure a sentence and paragraph. If you don’t, consider an English 101 class at your local community college. You need to understand basic grammar, word choice, and other things that constitute a well-crafted essay. Otherwise, you will require a budget for a professional, like me, to write and edit for you.
Storytelling: Create a well-crafted message with impact that motivates your readers to take an action. Storytelling involves the way you set up your topic in the reader’s mind and then wow them with a compelling statement that builds tension in the reader’s mind. Hook the reader’s attention and keep hooking them throughout your blog post with challenging statements and questions that continue to raise the level of tension. Tension is the key to storytelling. It’s the feeling in the reader’s heart that makes them want to know more.
Promotion: Blog posts succeed when you attract readers. When you blog your way to a book, you will at the same time build readership for your book when it comes out.

The second thing is having something to say about your topic. I’ll dive into what to say in my next blog post on this topic. In the meantime, have fun. And if you would like my help as a coach, post a comment below or contact me at paul dot Lloyd dot author at gmail dot com.

Monday, December 5, 2016

Writing Prompt #6

Prompt: When Martie caught the grunge…

4 Minute Timed Writing Result
When Martie caught the grunge, Blimslammer didn’t understand her immediate needs but caught on quickly when Martie slammed the bathroom door in his face.

“On Triffedoink, we  use 100% of our consumption so the grunge doesn’t exist,” said Blimslammer.

“Well, we need a private moment here on earth platform G7 and the artificial gravity really doesn’t do what it’s supposed to, so now I’ll need a shower, won’t I? So you go find something to do while I clean up.”

“Okay. No worries. I’ll make dinner.”

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I would be honored if you chose one of my novels for your next Amazon reading experience by clicking here. If you do, please let me know how you enjoyed it by commenting below or on Amazon. I also enjoy hearing from readers. Click here for my email which is paul dot lloyd dot author at gmail dot com. (Thanks for taking time to figure out that email address so I don’t have to worry about the spider bots getting me.)

Be sure to click on the BOGO button above for my latest buy one, get one free book offer.

Monday, November 28, 2016

What Are Your Business Passions?

Blog Your Way to a Book Series #3

Writing a book about your business expertise? Start by making a list of the things you might write about as blog posts. Later, you’ll gather the blog posts into a book. Business activities to place on your list:
  • Favorites that you are passionate about
  • Things you have special knowledge or experience about
  • Significant problems you have solved
  • New innovations you developed
  • Ways you improved existing methods
  • Anything else that interests you
Write your list and save it for future reference, but before you do, choose one topic that most appeals to you. This may be a tough decision, but you’re up to the challenge. Ask a few associates to choose one from your list that best describes what you know or do best. Often your colleagues and customers know your business expertise better than you do. Once you’ve gathered the list and surveyed your network, pick one topic to be the main focus of your book. The other items on the list will be useful as supporting material for your main topic.

With a topic in mind, think about a theme. Your theme is the main idea or underlying principle behind your book’s topic. For example, the topic of Jim Egerton’s book, Business on the Board, is how to deploy effective strategies and tactics in managing your business, functional area or department. His theme is: Use chess to guide your business decision making.

Once you have a topic and a theme in place, answer the following question: What is the wildest or most unexpected thing you can say about your topic?

Make a list of wild and unexpected statements about your topic and theme.  Don’t worry about whether they are true or false at this point. The idea is to circle around your topic and theme to give your book a sense of direction. Think of this exercise as a way to fine tune your topic and theme or test it to see if it passes the “Who cares” test.

Have fun. And if you would like my coaching help, post a comment below or click here to contact me at paul dot lloyd dot author at gmail dot com.

Monday, November 21, 2016

Buzzsaw Brain Training

The mind is like a buzzsaw, it can rip and tear, hurt or maim. It can kill a relationship. Put a break on your buzzsaw ways by thinking before you speak or act. Attach a brake to your mind to achieve a quality work life as part of a successful family and career. It all starts with work life balance.

If you try to feed wood into a buzzsaw improperly, the saw will jamb or the wood will be kicked out and thrown across the room, or it could be sucked into the blade and drag your hand with it before you can let go.

A brain works the same way. Thoughts are like pieces of wood. If you feed thoughts through your brain properly, you will have good things to say – uplifting things – funny things – happy things – compassionate things – consoling things – profitable things.

If you feed thoughts through your brain in the wrong way – evil thoughts will kick out – you may say unkind things – hateful things – degrading things – sad things – unprofitable things.

Train your brain. It’s like a muscle. It gets stronger with exercise. You will grow with it. Your spirit will grow with it also.

Here’s my contribution to brain training: Click on my BOGO page above, and you’ll discover how to purchase one of my novels or short stories and then receive The Case of the Knife-Tossing Networker: 12 Mysteries Requiring Deductive Reasoning for free. This 154-page PDF ebook includes a Special Bonus: The first 9 chapters of Snpgrdxz and the Time Monsters. Not only will you exercise your brain by demonstrating your skills in using the Internet to make a purchase, but you’ll also stretch your mind as you try to solve each of the 12 mysteries that require you to use deductive reasoning to figure out whodunit. No worries about solving the mysteries because I provided the answers for you in case you become stumped. ACT NOW because it’s free with a purchase and an offer like this is not here to stay.

Monday, October 31, 2016

Favorite Halloween Posts

As it turns out, I haven’t posted a scary story on Halloween on the blog. Instead, here are three past posts for your consideration for your Halloween reading.

Not Just Any Ghost
Rediscovering the Ring
How can a Christian write a story where a character commits a murder?

Among my novels, Hags, Steel Pennies and the Snpgrdxz series should tickle your scary bone. Save Fulfillment for your Christmas season reading.

I would be honored if you chose one of my stories for your next reading experience. If you do, please let me know how you enjoyed it by commenting below or on Amazon. I also enjoy hearing from readers at my author’s email address which is paul dot lloyd dot author at gmail dot com. (Thanks for taking time to figure out that email address so I don’t have to worry about the spider bots getting me.)

Be sure to click on the BOGO button above for my latest buy one, get one free book offer.

Monday, October 24, 2016

Writing Prompt #5

Prompt: Gather your woolens, mateys, there’s a storm a brewing.

4 Minute Timed Writing Result
Gather your woolens, mateys, there’s a storm a brewing.
Be there pirates and buccaneers, Cap’n Hightrousers?
I’ll take a dozen.
A dozen what?
Ears of that corn there. Buck a piece, right?
What are you talking about?
You said buck an ear. Here you go, matey.
Prices are high this summer. What happened to saving money at the farmers market?
In Naperville? You’ve got to be kidding me.

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I would be honored if you chose one of my stories for your next reading experience. If you do, please let me know how you enjoyed it by commenting below or on Amazon. I also enjoy hearing from readers at my author’s email address which is paul dot lloyd dot author at gmail dot com. (Thanks for taking time to figure out that email address so I don’t have to worry about the spider bots getting me.)

Be sure to click on the BOGO button above for my latest buy one, get one free book offer.

Tuesday, October 18, 2016

Squeeze Out the Cider

The cider press is painful to the apple, but joyful for the juice. Maintaining a work life balance works the same way. You seek a quality work life yet find it often puts the squeeze on you as you attempt to maintain your family and career.

Cider is the liquid essence of all that is good and sweet in an apple. In the same way, you are put through the cider press of life which is always a painful experience while you are undergoing the pressure of the press. However, it is joyful to be on the other side of the press, a transformed soul for the Lord. Take care that you do not spoil and lose your sweetness, but if you do, then even vinegar has its work to do in the purification of God’s people.

What is your joy today? Is it the joy of working? Or parenting? Or studying? The greatest joy and therefore the greatest challenge in life is blessing others. It’s counter intuitive. We naturally think of ourselves, our needs, our wants and our desires. Ayn Rand called this the “virtue of selfishness,” but Jesus said, “Love your neighbor as yourself.”

Self-centered thinking is easy since all you have to do is focus on the person you love most – yourself. It’s not easy to turn that thinking around to bless others.

In my younger years, I focused almost entirely on myself. As I matured, I learned that it was good to love others and to bless them with my gifts. Today, I seek to bless others through my smile where once I never smiled, a kind word where once I was silent, or a friendly hug where once I kept to myself.

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Here’s another blessing for you. Try Snpgrdxz and the Time Monsters. It’s book 1 of my new time travel adventure series available in ebook and paperback formats. Both qualify for my BOGO so be sure to click on the BOGO button above so you can obtain two full-length books for the price of one. The second book is The Case of the Knife-Tossing Networker: 12 Mysteries Requiring Deductive Reasoning. This 154-page PDF ebook is not available on Amazon or other book sales outlets.

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